187. Finding Fault With A Friend

"Where is Deepak?"

"He should be roaming with Mukesh. If the donkey is missing, we should look for it near a dilapidated wall. It will be standing there, scratching its back on the wall."

"It might be okay to compare Deepak to a donkey. But it is not appropriate to compare Mukesh, living in a palatial house, to a damaged wall!"

Even as some of Deepak's friends were talking about him this way, Deepak was with Mukesh, in Mukesh's palatial house.

"What is your program for tomorrow?" Mukesh asked Deepak.

"I have a seminar on Monday. I have to prepare for it" said Deepak.

"Yes. I remember your telling me about it. It is at some college near Madurantakam, isn't it?"

"Yes."

"You can take my car. I will send the driver too."

"Three of us are going there. We can travel by bus."

"It is okay. Both the car and the driver are going to be idle, otherwise" said Mukesh. "I could also come with you. But, I have a test that day" he added.

"When you are not coming, why should you send your car? We will go by bus" said Deepak.

"You have to take two buses to reach that remote place. Shouldn't my car be useful to a friend like you?"

'What have I done to deserve so much affection from him?' thought Deepak.

Deepak's father was working as a construction supervisor under a building contractor. He was not well placed, financially.

Observing that Deepak was moving closely with Mukesh, Deepak's father told him, "Mukesh's father is a wealthy businessman. We belong to the middle class. Be cautious while moving with Mukesh. Don't get too close to him. The friendship between a poor man and a rich man would often result in causing some trouble to the poor man" he said. 

However, Mukesh was uninhibited in his friendship with Deepak. He respected Deepak's parents, as he would his own parents. Whenever he visited Deepak's home, he acted as he if he was at his own home.

He would tell Deepak's mother, "Mom! That day you had made Chappathi and a delicious gravy, for packing in his lunch box. Will you make the same dishes for me today?"

Touched by Mukesh's graceful behaviour, Deepak's father told Deepak, "This boy is so friendly, affectionate and warm. His being wealthy is not an issue. You are fortunate to have such a wonderful person as your friend."

A few days after going to the seminar by Mukesh's car, Deepak was speaking to Raju, another friend of him. 

"Mukesh is an excellent person, no doubt. But he is afflicted by arrogance, a defining characteristic of wealthy people" said Deepak.

"How can you say such a thing about a person, who is your best friend?" asked Raju, surprised by Deepak's remark.

"He has been very good to us, of course. But, people in his household have no consideration for the people working for them."

"Even if that were the case, how can you blame Mukesh for the attitude of his parents? By the way, how do you know about this?" asked Raju. 

"You remember our going to Madurantakam in his car? At that time, his driver shared his grievances with me. It seems Mukesh's parents tire him endlessly. Even if there is no work, they won't allow him to go home early. They also won't allow him to take leave, even occasionally. The driver said that even Mukesh would treat him harshly. It pains me to learn that our friend Mukesh does such things" said Deepak.

In the next few days, Deepak observed some changes in Mukesh's attitude towards him. He avoided Deepak. While he conversed with his other friends, he hardly said anything to Deepak. Nor did he respond to Deepak's efforts to have a conversation with him. 

During the couple of times Deepak confronted Mukesh directly, Mukesh evaded him by saying that he had some other work to attend.

Deepak suspected that Mukesh would have come to know of what Deepak told Raju. How could he have known? Did Raju carry his remarks to Mukesh?

Deepak confronted Raju with his suspicion.

At first, Raju denied having told Mukesh about what Deepak said. When Deepak questioned him repeatedly, Raju admitted that he had inadvertently spilled Deepak's words to Mukesh. 

"Why did you do this?" Deepak asked Raju, angrily.

"During the course of our conversation, I made a mention of your remarks, due to a slip of my tongue. When Mukesh questioned me deeply, I had to report the entire conversation to him" said Raju.

"I told you something, trusting your discretion to keep it within you. But, you carried my words to Mukesh. Don't you think what you have done is improper?"

"You spoke to me disparagingly of your best friend. You didn't consider it wrong. But, you are finding fault with me for inadvertently revealing it to Mukesh, in the course of a conversation. Your idea of propriety is strange, indeed!" said Raju.

Deepak did not reply.

Thirukkural

Section 1
The Path of Virtue

Chapter 19
Refraining From Backbiting

Verse 187 (In Tamil)

pagach chollik kELirp pirippar nagach cholli
natpAdal thERRAdhavar.

Meaning:

Those who can't say good things about their friends to others and strengthen their friendship, will say unpleasant things about their friends behind their backs and get estranged from them.

(This is the English version of the Tamil story 'naNbanidam oru kuRai' by the same author)

Verse 188 (Soon)
Verse 186