63. Dhanraj's Woes

When Nallasivam went to his friend Dhanraj's house, Dhanraj's wife told him that he had gone out. After Nallasivam waited for a few minutes, Dhanraj returned home. Seeing Nallasivam, Dhanraj took him inside his room.

After he closed the door and sat near Nallasivam, Dhanraj couldn't control his tears. He covered his face with a towel and sobbed.

Perturbed by this sudden emotional display of Dhanraj, Nallasivam tried to console him, saying, "Dhanraj! Please calm yourself and tell me what the problem is."

"It is about my son Senthil. I spent a lot of money for his higher education, much more than I could afford.  But he discontinued his studies, saying that he found it too difficult to learn things. He wanted to start a business. I provided him the money needed for investment and also for the monthly expenses. Now he says that he has incurred losses in that business. He intends to start another line of business and wants me to fund his new venture. I pleaded with him not to venture into another business but to join me in looking after my family's agricultural activities. I am growing old and he can take over from me, I suggested. But he won't listen. He says that just as his elder brother has been working in Dubai and earning money, he should also do something and earn money and that the only way he could earn money is by doing business. I have already sold a part of my landholdings to fund his first business venture. If I were to fund his second venture, I should sell my remaining landholdings also! After selling my lands and foregoing the income I have been getting from cultivation, my wife and I will be driven to the state of begging for food."

Dhanaraj began to sob again.

"Why are you being so pessimistic, Nallasivam? Senthil could do well in his new venture. Moreover, your elder son Balu has been working in Dubai and earning well. Won't he take care of you in your old age?" said Nallasivam, in an attempt to placate Dhanraj.


"That's another story, Nallasivam. Soon after Balu got a job in Dubai, I persuaded him to get married so that he won't feel lonely at a new place, though he himself was not in a hurry to get married. Now he is leading a happy life there and my wife and I are happy about it. But he doesn't send us any money. He says that since his expenses in Dubai are high, he has no money to spare! Is he going to support us in our old age? No chance! It is my fate that both my sons are so unhelpful to their parents."

Nallasivam remained silent, not knowing how to console his friend.

"I am sorry, Nallasivam. I let out my feelings, without asking you about the purpose of your visit" said Dhanraj, apologetically.

"Nothing important. I am leaving for Chennai tonight. I wanted to tell you and take leave of you" said Nallasivam.

"Oh! You are going to stay with your son Raghu for a while. You will back after a couple of weeks, won't you?"

"Possibly, but I am not sure" said Nallasivam.

Nallasivam's elder son Raghu living in Chennai and younger son Ravi living in Bangalore had both been asking their parents to live with them permanently. Nallasivam and his wife decided to stay for a period of three months with each of them, then come back to their village and then decide about vacating their village house and living with their sons on a permanent basis.

Nallasivam didn't want to tell Dhanraj about his plan at a time when Dhanaraj was feeling let down by both his sons.

He decided to convey his plan to Dhanraj after a few days by calling him over phone from Chennai.

Thirukkural
Section 1
The Path of Virtue

Chapter 7
The Boon of Having Children

Verse 63 (In Tamil)

tham poruL enba tham makkaL avar poruL

tham tham vinaiyAn varum.

Meaning:

Our children are our assets. What kind of assets one gets will be determined by the consequences of one's deeds in one's previous birth(s).

(This is the English version of the Tamil story 'iraNdu piLLaigaL' by the same author)

Verse 64
Verse 62

62. The Roadside "Saint"

"I wonder what sins I had committed in my previous birth. Life has been a torment for me" lamented Punyakoti.

"Your name means 'one who performed a million good deeds.' If you talk like this, what could people like me say?" said his friend Paa.Viswanathan. He had the nickname 'Paavi' coined from his initials, which in Tamil meant 'a sinner!'

"What is there in a name? There is a joke about a man who went to a doctor complaining about chronic cough. The doctor asked for his name to write out a prescription for him. When he said that his name was 'Arogyaraj,' the doctor could not control his laughter, because 'Arogyaraj' means 'king of health' said Victor and added. "Take my own case. My name is Victor but I keep losing money in the card game every day!"

"Are these beliefs about previous births and the consequences of our actions in the previous births haunting us in the present birth true? Should I suffer during the current birth the punishment for my sins committed in my previous birth?" asked Punyakoti.

"Not just in this birth. The punishment can be carried forward to our future births as well" said Viswanathan.

"Why is it so?" queried Victor.

"It is because the sins committed by us are so many that we won't be able to withstand the punishment for all of them in one birth. So, God distributes the punishment over several births!" clarified Viswanathan.

"What will happen to the sins that we commit during this birth?" asked Punyakoti.

"They get added up to sins accumulated by us in our previous births. Thus, even as the sins committed by us in the previous births are getting squared off by the punishment we have been suffering in this birth, the package gets bigger and bigger with the accumulation of more and more sins!" explained Viswanathan

"In that case, will our package of sins never get exhausted? Do we have to undergo more and more births and continue to suffer?" asked Punyakoti, feeling desperate.

"There is a way out!" said a voice.

All the three men looked around for locating the source of the voice. They found a man wearing a soiled dhoti lying down on the ground, with his head placed on the base of the trunk of a tree.

The three were trying to judge whether the man was a beggar, a saint, a vagabond, a mystic or a traveler resting under the tree.

'If your children are persons of character and are free from any blemish, no suffering will touch you during any of your seven births" the man continued.

"How do you say this, sir?" asked Victor.

"I am not saying this. Thiruvalluvar says so."

The man then turned his head, closed his eyes and resumed his sleep.

Thirukkural
Section 1
The Path of Virtue

Chapter 7
The Boon of Having Children

Verse 62 (In Tamil)

ezhu piRappum thIyavai thINda pazhi piRangA
paNbudai makkatpeRin.

Meaning:

Those who beget children who won't be tainted by any sin will be untouched by any harm during their seven births.

(This is the English version of the Tamil story 'maraththadi sAmiyAr' by the same author)

Verse 63
Verse 61

61. The Sixteen Riches

"May you be blessed with the sixteen reaches and may you live a glorious life!"

Listening to the above message from several people who greeted him on the occasion of his marriage, Shankar wondered how many people would have known the meaning of this traditional greeting. But it immediately occurred to him that his father's friend Sundaramurthy, a Tamil scholar who was present for the occasion should know the meaning.

When Sankar became free,with most of the invitees having disbursed after greeting him, he approached Sundaramurthy and asked him, "Sir, what are the sixteen riches mentioned in this traditional greeting?" 

"A good question. This greeting has been used over several generations. Most of the people who use this greeting have no idea what the riches are. I appreciate your interest in knowing them. There are divergent views about what these sixteen riches are. I will tell you what these are, based on a verse created by the renowned poet Kalamegam. The sixteen riches are:

1. Fame

2. Education

3. Valour

4. Victory

5. Worthy children

6. Courage

7. Wealth

8. Abundance of food

9. Wellness

10. Comforts

11. Wisdom

12. Elegance

13. Honour

14. Righteousness

15. Good Lineage

16. Longevity.

Some words like valour and courage, fame and honour may appear to be synonymous. Let us not go into the fine shades of difference in their meanings. Good lineage may be taken to mean a good name for the family. Are you ready to receive these sixteen riches?" said Sundaramurthy.

"I will feel blessed, if I get these riches due to the good wishes of people like you" said Shankar.

"You have learnt how to be polite and dignified! I appreciate this. In our younger days, some people would jocularly interpret these sixteen riches to mean sixteen children. If someone blesses a newly-wed person saying, 'May you be blessed with the sixteen,' he will respond 'Oh, I can't manage to bring up sixteen children. One or two will suffice!' This has been a stale joke for long. This response emanated from the reality of people having a large number of children during those days. Those were the days when having a a large number of children was considered a blessing. Not any more! If God appears before you and asks you, 'Do you want me to bless you with the sixteen riches or a couple of worthy children?' you should ask for one or two good children rather than ask for the sixteen riches. That will be the wise thing to do, There can't be a greater blessing than having worthy children. If you have good children, you can get al the riches through them. So, when you pray to God, pray for worthy children."

Shankar was happy that a question posed by him out of curiosity ended up in wisdom and good advice.

Thirukkural
Section 1
The Path of Virtue

Chapter 7
The Boon of Having Children

Verse 61 (In Tamil)

peRumvaRRuL yAmaRivadhu illai aRivaRindha
makkatpERu all piRa.

Meaning:

As far as I know, there is no other treasure more valuable than having children who possess the necessary wisdom.

(This is the English version of the Tamil story 'vENdAm padhinARu' by the same author)

Verse 62
Verse 60

60. Ranjani and Anjali

"Hey Raghu! How are you? I am meeting you for the first time after your marriage. And you didn't attend my marriage!" said Rajesh.

"I told you already why I couldn't make it. I had been to Delhi for my company's work at the time of your marriage. Has your wife come here? I can meet her now" replied Raghu.

"See the lady talking to your wife. That's her. I just learnt that they have already been acquainted."

"In that case, both of us have to be cautious. In all probability, they are talking about you and me, possibly complaining about us! So, let us also talk about our spouses. What kind of a person is your wife?" asked Raghu. 

"Well. She is great company. But, she is particular about getting what she wants. Within a year of our marriage, she made me buy jewelry for her twice!" said Rajesh.

"You seem to be flush with money!" taunted Raghu.

"Not at all. I had to borrow money to buy jewelry for her. Unfortunately, the price of gold has fallen now, but my borrowing has gone up due to accrual of interest!" lamented Rajesh.

"Does your wife know that you had to borrow money to buy gold jewelry for her?"

"It was she who insisted that I borrow money and buy jewelry for her! Now, tell me what type of a person is your wife?" 

"In this aspect, I think she is of a type opposite to that of your wife. I had taken a loan for my business. When she came to know of this, she asked me to repay the loan by selling her jewelry. She said, 'you can buy me jewelry some time in the future, when you have enough money. Now, the priority is to be debt-free.' I was surprised by her prudence and economic sense. Following her advice, I sold her jewels and repaid my loans. I am debt-free now. Getting rid of the interest burden has given me immense relief. Now, I have to save money and buy jewelry for her" said Raghu.

"This is great. You are fortunate to have a wife with such an outlook. I wish my wife were like that. Ok. Any update on your becoming a father?" asked Rajesh.

"My wife is in the family way. I will become a proud father in six months. What about you?"

"Congratulations! The time has not come for me to become a father!"

"You will, soon enough" wished Raghu.

"No chance. My wife feels that we should wait for a couple of years!" said Rajesh, with disappointment.

"Why did you have to conceive so soon?" asked Ranjani, Rajesh's wife.

"I conceived only seven or eight months after my marriage. You call it soon?" countered, Anjali, Raghu's wife.

"Look at me. I firmly told my husband that we can't think of a child at least for two more years. After the marriage, should we not give ourselves some time to enjoy life? By the way, I find that you are not wearing any jewels! Won't you take out your jewels from the bank locker?"

"We don't have a bank locker and I don't have jewels to keep in a bank locker! I am not particularly enamoured of adorning myself with jewelry" replied Anjali.

"Strange for a woman to say so!" said Ranjani.

After that, they talked about other topics.

When the two couples ran into each other after two years in a function, the weight of jewels that adorned Ranjani had gone up, just as Rajesh's debt had.

Anjali was not wearing any jewels. She was carrying her eighteen month old baby. Anjali's child attracted the attention of people much more than the lustre of jewels worn by Ranjani.

Thirukkural
Section 1
The Path of Virtue

Chapter 6
The Worth of A Wife

Verse 60 (In Tamil)

mangalam enba manaimAtchi maRRu adhan
nankalam nanmakkat pERu.

Meaning:

A harmonious married life is a boon;

Having good children adds lustre to it.

(This is the English version of the Tamil story 'avaL appadiththAn' by the same author)

Verse 61
Verse 59

59. Rukmini's Plans

For Balakrishnan, a small farmer in a village, getting married to Rukmini, an educated girl from a city was a moment of pride. But the euphoria turned out to be momentary. 

Soon after the marriage, Balakrishnan was disappointed to learn that his wife's focus was only on money.

"Do yo know why I married a villager like you, in spite of  my having been born and brought up in a city and having had a college education?" Rukmini asked Balakrishnan, a few days after their marriage.

"Are you going to say that you did so because you liked me so much. If you say so, I will get burst unable to contain the joy that will fountain in my mind!" said Balakrishnan, jokingly. But, he wished that she would say so.

"I am not a person who will tell lies to please people. Though I was not enamoured of living in a small village like this, I married you because you are a landlord. Though you are a small farmer, you earn income by cultivating your own land. But if I had married someone working in a city, I would have married a person akin to a slave. Whether he was a peon or high level executive, he would have been a person beholden to his employer."

Balakrishnan felt relieved that she was at least respecting his trade.

"But your earnings are not good enough. There is no scope for getting more income from cultivation. So, I am planning to start a business" said Rukmini.

"You are going to start a business? In our village? I don't see much scope for it. Moreover, I don't have the money to invest in a business."

"Give me ten thousand rupees as a loan. I will return the money to you with interest in one year. If you can't lend me the money, I will get it from my father. But he will get the interest income instead of your getting it!"

"I can spare ten thousand rupees. I will hand you the money today itself. But what business are you going to start, by investing ten thousand rupees?"

"The most profitable business in the world - lending money for interest! During the past few days I have been living in this village, I have found that there are people in desperate need of money, even small sums of money. But there are no moneylenders here. People go to the nearby town traveling through a bus to get loans for petty sums from the pawn shops there. If they take the loan from me, they can save the bus fare and of course time."

"For heaven's sake, don't take up the business of moneylending, Rukmini!" pleaded Balakrishnan.

"Why?"

"My family has a reputation of helping the poor and the needy. My ancestors have helped a lot of people in this village. Most of their help has been by way of donations. Even when they had lent money, they lent it free of interest. They didn't even ask for repayment of the principal from people who were not in a position to repay. Coming from such a noble lineage, if we lend money for interest, it will besmirch our family's reputation."

"I was wondering why your family's networth has been dwindling over generations. Now I understand the reason. Your ancestors had given away their wealth in return for gaining a reputation as benefactors. As a result, you are on the verge of bankruptcy now!"

"Watch your words, Rukmini. My ancestors have left me assets sufficient to facilitate our living comfortable life. Do you know in how high an esteem our family is held by the people of this village? If you walk on the streets, many people meeting you on the way will hail you as Mahalakshmi*" said Balakrishnan, irritated by Rukmini's irreverent observations.

"What is the point in being called the Goddess of Wealth when we don't possess wealth? I would like to be a real Mahalakshmi, not a namesake. Your earnings are just sufficient for our survival. We should give good education to the children that would be born to us. We should create wealth and leave it for our children so that they and their future generations could live in prosperity. The income we need to achieve these financial goals can be generated only through the business of moneylending" said Rukmini.

"Please, Rukmini. Drop this plan. I won't allow you to take up this business" said Balakrishnan, sounding firm and authoritative.

"If you won't permit me, I will put up a small hut at some place in this village, reside there and run this business, by borrowing money from my father" said Rukmini, defiantly.

Balakrishnan gave up, feeling helpless.

When Rukmini sought a loan of ten thousand rupees from her father, he gave her a sum of one lakh rupees, saying that she needed a larger capital to sustain the business.

Rukmini started her moneylending business. As envisaged by her, there was a good demand for loans from several people in the village. Rukmini was cautious, lending only small sums of money in the beginning. With interest payments and loan repayments coming in, her capital began to grow steadily within a few months.

Rukmini was ruthless in recovering the interest and principal. She would go to the homes of the defaulters and yell at them by standing outside their homes. Embarrassed and humiliated by her yelling and the harsh language used by her, the defaulters paid their dues. The fear created by the treatment she meted out to the defaulters also had the effect of making other people to repay the dues in time.

Balakrishnan distanced himself from his wife's business. However, some people conveyed to him their disapproval of Rukmini's ways. Balakrishnan mostly avoided responding to those comments. Sometimes, when he felt compelled to respond, he would say, "This is my wife's business. I have no role in it."

One day, Balakrishnan's friend Kalimuthu came to see him. He said, "I came to return the loan of five thousand rupees I took from you for raising the crops."

"What is the urgency? You said that you would repay the loan after the harvest. There are still a few months for the harvest. Where did you get the money?" asked Balakrishnan.

"I borrowed it from my brother in law."

"Why? I didn't ask you to repay the money."

"You didn't and I know you won't. But when your wife is running a moneylending business, it is not appropriate for me to keep an interest free loan unpaid for long. If your wife comes to know that I had borrowed money from you free of interest and makes any adverse comment about it, I won't be able to stand it!" said Kalimuthu.

Balakrishnan cursed his helplessness.

*Mahalaksmi - The Hindu Goddess of Wealth

Thirukkural
Section 1
The Path of Virtue

Chapter 6
The Worth of A Wife

Verse 59 (In Tamil)

pugazh purindha illilOrkku illai igazhvArin mun
ERu pOl pIdu nadai.

Meaning:

A person whose wife has no concern for upholding the honour of the family cannot walk with his head high in front of people who deride him.

(This is the English version of the Tamil story 'rukmiNiyin thittangaL' by the same author)

Verse 60
Verse 58

58. Suguna's Questions

Unlike Karthik who revered monks clad in saffron clothes and listened to their discourses, his wife Suguna didn't have much faith in monks and saints.

But when Saint Meyyananda came to her town, Suguna went to his discourse. This was because Meyyananda had a reputation for answering any question fielded to him without skirting them or bypassing them. His answers were straightforward and sometimes shocking because they carried naked truths.

After completing his discourse, Meyyananda began to answer the questions posed by the audience.

When Suguna got the chance to ask a question, she asked him, "Swamiji! They say our scriptures have prescribed four stages of life, namely brahmacharya, grahasta, vAnaprasta and sanyAsa*. But these are only for men. Why is it that women are not covered under these four stages?"

"There are three reasons for this. One, if these stages were prescribed for both men and women, a man and his wife might choose to adopt different stages of life at a particular time. When the husband wants to adopt to vAnaprasta, the wife may prefer to continue in grahasta phase! This will create disharmony in the family.

"Men have stopped following this system since long. Unlike men, women are steadfast in following the customs and systems. So, if women had been covered under this system, they would still be following it, the way they have been following various vratas (vows) like fasting on ekadasi** etc. That would have created disharmony in the family and by extension in the society. May be our ancestors didn't want this to happen! This is the second reason.

"The third reason is that ours is a male-dominated society. Of these three reasons, the third reason is most significant!"

The saint laughed aloud and the audience joined him in his laughter.

"Swamiji! It is said that one has to go through these four stages of life to attain salvation. Does it mean women will have no salvation?" asked Suguna.

"Women are blessed with the opportunity of delivering a child to this world through their body. Can there be a greater salvation than this?"

The audience laughed again

"I am not saying this in a lighter vein. Truly, nothing can be a greater privilege to a woman than her acting as a channel for bringing a new life into this world" said Meyyananda.

Suguna remained silent, her face expression showing that she was not satisfied with the answer she got.

Meyyananda looked at her and remarked, "You don't seem to be satisfied with the answer I gave!"

"No, I am not!" said Suguna.

The crowd looked at her, shocked by her brazenness.

"Just because women are blessed with the privilege of motherhood, it doesn't mean that they are denied salvation. Unlike men, women have the opportunity of attaining heaven without the need to go through the four stages of life. They don't have any prescription for this" clarified the saint.

"Does it mean women don't have to do anything to attain salvation?" asked Suguna.

"Yes. It is enough if a woman just looks after her husband and her family with care and attention. But if you are going to say, 'Oh, that is a herculean task. Retiring to the forest and doing penance there under severe conditions will be much easier than this.' you won't be wrong!"

Even as the rest of the audience was pondering whether the monk's statement was to be greeted with laughter. Suguna laughed out aloud, with the monk joining her.

* brahmacharya - bachelorhood, 
   grahasta-marital life
   vAnapasta = retiring to the forest to live a secluded life

   sanyAsa - renunciation

** ekadasi - 11th day after the full moon or new moon.   

Thirukkural
Section 1
The Path of Virtue

Chapter 6
The Worth of A Wife

Verse 58 (In Tamil)

peRRAR peRin peRuvar peNdir perum siRappup
puththELir vAzhum ulagu.

Meaning:

A woman who looks after her husband and family well will attain heaven inhabited by the celestials.

(This is the English version of the Tamil story 'kELvi varumbOdhu badhil onRu vENdum' by the same author)

Verse 59
Verse 57

57. Ramkumar Relents!

When Ramya was assigned to Ramkumar as his personal secretary, he felt a little uncomfortable. 

A senior executive in his company, Ramkumar had a separate cabin. His personal secretary's seat was in a small enclosure outside his cabin.

All along, he had only men as his personal secretaries. For the first time, he had a young woman as his secretary.

On the very first day of assuming office as his secretary, Ramya took the liberty of stepping into his cabin during the lunch interval and sharing with him the tomato rice she had brought from home for lunch. He could neither refuse to accept the portion of tomato rice she offered nor could he reprimand her for entering his cabin without even knocking at the door.

"Who made this? Your mother?" asked Ramkumar, by way of saying something out of courtesy.

"My mother? Why, it was me who prepared it! My mother resides at her home" said Ramya, in a tone of mild reprimand for his misconception.

"Where do you reside, then?" asked Ramkumar. He realized immediately that it was a stupid question which had emanated from him mechanically.

Ramya gazed at him like a teacher gazing at a student wondering how dumb he could get and said, "I reside in my husband's house. Where else can I be? After all, we have not yet got divorced!"

She laughed, enjoying her own joke.

"I am sorry" said Ramkumar, feeling embarrassed. 'How stupid of me to have presumed that she is unmarried!' Ramkumar cursed himself.

"What is the use of feeling sorry now? You should have met me before I got married!" quipped Ramya.

Ramkumar looked at her with a shocked expression. 'What kind of a woman is she? I should keep myself at a distance from her!' he thought.

"Looking at a woman, we can say whether she is married or not, since a married woman will be wearing the mangala sUtra* around her neck. But we can't determine the marital status of a man by looking at him, since a married man carries no such symbol on his body. However, looking at you, I can definitely say that you are married" said Ramya, with a smirk on her face.

"How do you say that?"

"I won't tell you. This is a secret known only to women. You may find this out from your wife!"

After coming home that evening, Ramkumar asked his wife Ganga, "Do women have a way of finding out whether a man is married?"

"Who told you this?" asked Ganga. 

"They have assigned me a new secretary by name Ramya. She only told me this." 

"I don't know. You may as well ask her about this!" said Ganga.

It appeared to Ramkumar that Ganga was angry. 'Is she apprehensive of my getting close to my lady secretary?'

He was worried what he was going to say, if Ramya asked him the next day whether he got the secret from his wife.

But Ramya didn't ask him about it.

More than a month passed since Ramya had become Ramkumar's secretary. Though she was often jovial and at times even frivolous while talking to him, she was efficient and professional in carrying out her responsibilities.

Ramkumar soon realized that Ramya was not a flirting type as hastily perceived by him earlier. He found that she was a person with a jovial disposition and a free spirit. She seemed to have a detached attitude while dealing with him. 'You are my superior. So, I carry out the tasks you assign to me. Otherwise, I am free to think and act the way I like' seemed to be her attitude.

He heard about an incident in which when a colleague of Ramya tried to make sexual overtures to her, she removed her slipper signaling that she would hit him with it, leading to that person backing out apologizing.

Ramya didn't tell Ramkumar about the incident. He didn't ask her about it either. But Ramya went up in his esteem after he had learnt about the incident.

Ramkumar asked Ganga, "Ganga! I want to ask you something. Do you want to take up a job?"

Ganga's face lit up on hearing this.

"You know I was working before we got married. It was because of your insistence that I shouldn't go for a job that I quit my job. Not a day passes without me regretting that I have been remaining idle, sitting at home. If you give the green signal, I would start looking for a job today itself. I am sure to land a job of my choice soon" she said enthusiastically.

"I am sorry, Ganga!" said Ramkumar, regretting his obstinate insistence that Ganga should be a stay-at-home wife. (Ramya's tantalizing response when he told her 'I am sorry' the day of her beginning to work under him came to his mind involuntarily!)

"I stopped you from going for a job because of my apprehension that there was no safety for women outside the home. Now I realize that a woman can safeguard herself, if she has wit and wisdom. Hereafter, I won't stand in the way of your desires and plans" he told Ganga, feeling remorseful.

"Thanks a lot. But I think I should really thank Ramya for this. She is the one who has changed your thinking!" said Ganga, feeling ecstatic at her husband's change of attitude.

"How do you say this?"

"Well, this is a technique known only to women. Find out what it is from Ramya!" 

Ganga threw a large smile at him and went inside.

*mangala sUtra - a thread or chain worn by a married woman.

Thirukkural
Section 1
The Path of Virtue

Chapter 6
The Worth of A Wife

Verse 57 (In Tamil)

siRai kAkkum kAppu evan seyyuum magaLir
niRai kAkkum kAppE thalai.

Meaning:

A woman's chastity cannot be protected by locking her up. Only her determination can protect her chastity.

(This is the English version of the Tamil story 'vIttil peNNaip pUtti vaippOm enRa vindhai manithar' by the same author)

Verse 58

Verse 56

56. Burdens Pleasant to Carry

When the alarm rang, Sumitra didn't wake up. She had woken up five minutes before that. She had finished brushing her teeth when the alarm rang. 

Having got used to getting up at a particular time at the ringing of the alarm, she could wake up even a few minutes before the alarm went off.

'I need not set the alarm hereafter' she thought, after stopping the alarm.

'My dear alarm clock! Hereafter, you don't have to keep awake the whole night so as to wake me up in the early morning!'

For the next one hour, she was working in the kitchen making breakfast and lunch for everyone including her husband, her mother-in-law and her two children. After packing the lunch for her two school-going children and for herself, she gently woke up her mother-in-law. 

She appraised her mother-in-law of what she had prepared for breakfast and lunch and then got ready to leave for work.

"Why are you leaving so early today?" queried her mother-in-law.

"Hereafter, I have to commute to work by bus. So, I have to start early."

"Why? Won't Saravanan pick you up?"

"No. They have changed the shift for him. He will start late. I can't ride with him."

"My goodness! Already, you have been toiling for the whole day. Now, you have to start earlier! How can you bear the additional strain?"

"Your concern for me is a great source of strength for me, aunty! It is very rare to find a mother-in-law like you who has so much concern for her daughter-in-law" said Sumitra, moved by her mother-in-law's empathy.

Sumitra couldn't control her tears.

"Don't cry, dear! Your ordeal will be over soon" consoled her mother-in-law.

'She doesn't know why I am crying just as she doesn't know why I couldn't ride with Saravanan for commuting to work!' thought Sumira.

Saravanan, a colleague of her lived close to her. He offered to pick her up on his two-wheeler while going for work and drop her back. Though initially Sumitra was reluctant to accept the arrangement, given the social taboo against a woman riding with a man not related to her, she accepted it after being persuaded by her husband and mother-in-law.

Sumitra told her colleagues that Saravanan was a cousin of her. Saravanan also addressed her akka (elder sister). Yet, tongues wagged in her workplace, attributing illicit relationship between the two. But Sumitra was not bothered, knowing that gossip was a reality in all organizations.

After several months, a complication arose in her relationship with Saravanan.

While returning home from work, the two would have tea in a roadside restaurant. The previous day, when they were having tea, Saravanan addressed her as "Sumitra!" instead of the usual "akka" and then told her, "Sumitra! I am only one year younger to you. So, hereafter, I am going to call you by your name!"

Sumitra stared at him for a moment. She quietly drank her tea without saying anything. She then got up and walked away abruptly. Saravanan, upset by her reaction, came after her and apologized to her saying, "Sorry, akka. If you don't like it..."

Sumitra cut him off saying, "Hereafter, I will commute to work by bus. You don't have to take the trouble of picking me up and dropping me. Don't come by my house hereafter" and walked away. She boarded a bus at the nearby bus-stop and reached home.

When Sumitra reflected on the incident, it occurred to her that Saravanan acted that way in a moment of weakness but would correct himself after knowing that she didn't approve of his taking that kind of a liberty with her. However, she thought that once he had slipped, it won't be appropriate to continue her friendship with him and decided to cut off the relationship.

When her mother-in-law spoke out of concern for her, Sumitra broke down regretting that Saravanan had broken a good friendship by his inappropriate behaviour.

When Sumitra returned home that evening, her children enthusiastically greeted her. After conversing with them briefly, Sumitra went to the room where her husband Raghavan was lying on the bed.

"How did you like the lunch today? I had prepared Brinjal sambar*, but since you don't like Brinjal, I kept aside some sambar without Brinjal pieces for you. But I forgot to inform your mother about it" said Sumitra.

"Leave it. Why didn't you ride with Saravanan today? Mom said that he had been assigned to a different shift. But I know there is no shift system in your company!" said Raghavan

Sumitra felt like crying. Controlling her tears, she said, "How long can this arrangement go on? Some people at the office have been gossiping about us. You often say 'we shouldn't depend on anyone.' So, I decided to discontinue the arrangement."

Raghavan looked into her eyes, but she averted his gaze.

"Something has happened. I am sure you will tell me after sometime!" said Raghavan, smiling.

"Ok. Please get up. Practice walking, holding on to me."

Raghavan, who was recovering from a paralytic attack, put his arm around Sumitra's shoulders and began to walk."

"You are walking more firmly today than you were yesterday!" said Sumitra, with enthusiasm.

"Everyday, you get up in the early morning, prepare breakfast and lunch for all of us, pack lunch for you and the children, go to work and help me walk immediately after returning from work. Don't you feel tired?" asked Raghavan.

"No!" said Sumitra.

 

Thirukkural
Section 1
The Path of Virtue

Chapter 6
The Worth of A Wife

Verse 56 (In Tamil)

thaRkAththuth thRkoNdAn pENith thagaisAnRa
soRkAththuch chOrvilAL peN.

Meaning:

An ideal woman is one who protects herself, takes care of her husband and ensures that the good name of her family is preserved.

(This is the English version of the Tamil story 'sugamAna sumaigaL' by the same author)

Verse 57

Verse 55

55. Will it Rain Today?

"Don't you have the practice of lighting a lamp in front of God's portrait in your home, Priya?" asked Padma, Priya's mother-in-law.

"We do have, aunty" replied Priya.

"Then, why didn't you do it today?" demanded Padma.

"I didn't want to light a lamp before taking a shower!"

"So, you have been cooking food before taking a shower!" exclaimed Padma, as though shocked by Priya's behaviour.

"I am cooking food just for my husband. I will cook for you after taking a shower."

"You want to cook food for each of us separately! Won't it result in wasteful use of cooking gas and  provisions? Moreover, you will be straining yourself by cooking twice!"

Priya mentally thanked her mother-in-law for showing concern for her, knowingly or unknowingly.

"I can't help it, aunty. He has to leave for work early today. I had to prepare some food earlier so as to give him packed lunch."

"Some days, he would leave for work early. On those days, I would ask him to have his lunch in some restaurant. I won't cook lunch for him. This was the practice before you got married to him!" told Padma.

"He told me that I need not cook lunch for him and that he would have his lunch in a restaurant. But I insisted on my cooking and packing the lunch for him lest he should spoil his health by eating some unhealthy food at the restaurant."

Though momentarily Padma was struck by the typical feeling of a mother-in-law 'Do you have greater concern for my son than I do?' she nevertheless felt happy about Priya's concern for the health of Padma's dear son. 

However, not willing to relent in her insistence on adherence to established practices, she told Priya, "Look, Priya. Under no circumstances should we deviate from religious practices. It is an established practice in our family that women should take their shower, light the lamp in front of God's portrait and then only start cooking. You can't deviate from this whether it is for the sake of serving your husband or serving the king!"

'A king will have many people to serve him but my husband has only me to take care of his needs' thought Priya.

After Priya's husband left for work, Priya took her shower. When she returned from her shower, she found that Padma was cooking the flour slurry for making vaththal*.

"What aunty, are we going to make vaththal today?" asked Priya.

"Yes. Come and join me quickly. Only if we mould the flour into vaththal now, it will dry by the evening" said Padma.

"I think it may rain today" said Priya, with concern.

"It won't rain in the month of Chiththirai**. Perhaps you are misled by the sun's rays being a bit dull today. You will see that after a while the sun will begin to scorch and the vaththal pieces we mould will get dried by the evening" said Padma, with confidence.

But even as the two women were moulding the cooked flour into vaththal, rain drops began to pound, their force intensifying within a few minutes.

*vaththal - a dish made by casting cooked rice flour into moulds and drying them. The dried pieces can be preserved for long and and can be served after frying in oil.

**Chiththirai is the first month inthe Tamil calendar corresponding to the period between the middle of April and the middle of May.

Thirukkural
Section 1
The Path of Virtue

Chapter 6
The Worth of A Wife

Verse 55 (In Tamil)

dheyvam thozhAL kozhunan thozhudhezhuvAL
pey enap peyyum mazhai.

Meaning:

Rain will pour down at the bidding of a wife who worships her husband rather than God.

(This is the English version of the Tamil story 'mazhai varumA' by the same author)

Verse 56 (Soon)

Verse 54

54. Madhavi's Manouvre

Lakshmi, who was getting relieved from her position as the personal secretary of the Branch Manager of the company after she resigned her job, appraised Madhavi, who was to replace her, of the tasks related to the position.  

The day Lakshmi was to be relieved, she reluctantly told Madhavi, "Madhavi! Initially, I didn't want to talk to you about this. But during the few days I have interacted with you, you have made me feel so close to you that I feel I should share this with you."

"Tell me, Lakshmi!" said Madhavi.

"Our Branch Manager Murthy has a habit of behaving inappropriately with the women employees. We can survive here only if we learn to put up with his behaviour."

"What do you mean by 'putting up with his behaviour?' What kind of behaviour are you referring to?" asked Madhavi, in a perplexed tone.

"Well...He will comment about our appearance, our attire etc. He will say 'you look stunning in this dress,' 'this colour suits your complexion' etc. He will tell us some dirty jokes. Sometimes, he will touch us while talking to us..."

"He will touch us!" exclaimed Madhavi, feeling shocked.

"He will do it in a way to make it seem accidental, unintentional or inconspicuous. But when he does it repeatedly, we can understand his intentions!"

"You have been putting up with this kind of behaviour?" asked Madhavi, in disbelief.

"What could I do? He is a senior executive. He has the power to fire me. I am unmarried. I am used to men making passes at me. I used to console myself thinking that it was like someone intentionally rubbing against my body in a crowded bus. But the lady who worked in this position before me was a married woman. She also put up with this. She cried when she shared her ordeal with me at the time of her leaving the job. You are also married. So, I wanted to caution you!" said Lakshmi.

Madhavi was both amused and angry that Lakshmi thought that it would be easier for an unmarried woman to put up with such behaviour.

"Thank you Lakshmi, for appraising me" said Madhavi.

At home, Madhavi discussed this issue with her husband. She thought that he might ask her to quit the job. But he was unperturbed. "You can handle this," he said. Madhavi wondered how.

Murthy began to exhibit the kind of behaviour Lakshmi had talked about.

"Your name sounds sexy...well, I mean attractive!" he told Madhavi.

Madhavi didn't respond to this.

Emboldened by her silence, Murthy went on. "I have noticed that not all costumes suit everyone. But you look attractive in all costumes."

"Just a minute, sir. I need to take this call" said Madhavi and went out of his cabin, without waiting for his nod. She returned after a couple of minutes.

"Who was the caller?" asked Murthy.

Ignoring his impertinence, Madhavi told him, "Sir, you said you wanted me to attend to some letters."

"Yes. This is a test for your ability to draft replies to letters. Take these letters, type out suitable replies and bring them to me" said Murthy, taking out a couple of letters from his desk.

Thinking 'this is a test for you too!' Madhavi positioned her mobile which she, when she had gone out of his cabin, set for shooting a video, in a particular angle.

'I hope that in this angle, the scene will be captured clearly!'

Her right hand holding the mobile phone, she stretched her left hand to receive the letters from him.

"Why do you stretch out your left hand? Are you left-handed?" asked Murthy.

In the guise of handing over the letters to her, he gripped her wrist. Madhavi pressed the video button.

Seeing that Madhavi had not protested, he moved his palm over her forearm.

"Take away your hand, sir. The video has been taken!" said Madhavi.

Murthy pulled away his hand in a jerk, as if hit by an electric shock and asked her, "What is this?" in a tone that displayed more panic than authority.

Madhavi showed him the video captured in her mobile and said, "I have shot what you did! Your wife should feel happy if she watches this. My face has not been captured here. So, I can post this in Facebook as well! I was a little concerned whether I would get a good view, since I was shooting at an angle from below. But the video has come out nicely. Hats off to modern technology!"

"What do you want?" asked Murthy, in a tone mixed with desperation and apprehension.

"First, you should treat me with the dignity due to me as a person, even though I am your subordinate. Secondly, you should stop behaving inappropriately with the women working here."

Murthy stood nonplussed, unable to decide how to respond to this.

"Don't worry. I won't use this video to blackmail you. I will give you the respect due to you as my superior. I will stick to the discipline required of my position and carry out my responsibilities sincerely."

Without waiting for Murthy's reply, Madhavi took hold of the letters held by Murthy and left his cabin.

Thirukkural
Section 1
The Path of Virtue

Chapter 6
The Worth of A Wife

Verse 54 (In Tamil)

peNNin perundhakka yAvuLa kaRpennum
thiNmai uNdAgap peRin.

Meaning:

If a woman has the valuable quality of chastity, what can be more glorious than her?

(This is the English version of the Tamil story 'mAdhaviyum kaNNagidhAn' by the same author)

Verse 55

Verse 53