441. A Distant Relative

Rajiv met Subbu in a wedding. He noticed Subbu talking to his father. Later, Rajiv asked his father "Who is that, daddy?"

"He is Subbu, a distant relative of mine. His father and my father are cousins" said Rajiv's father.

After a while, when Rajiv was sitting in the marriage hall, he observed that Subbu was sitting next to him. He turned to Subbu and greeted him. Subbu smiled, acknowledging his greeting and indicating that he knew the identity of Rajiv.

After having his lunch hosted by the organizers of the wedding, Rajiv came out of the wedding hall, intending to take a stroll. He saw Subbu, standing outside the hall, and went near him.

"Have you had your lunch?" asked Subbu.

"Yes, sir. What about you?" asked Rajiv.

"Not yet. While attending weddings, I follow a practice of having my lunch in the last batch" said Subbu.

"Why, sir?"

"I don't have any pressing engagements. Therefore, I can wait till those who are in a hurry to leave, those who are hungry and anxiously waiting for the lunch party to start and those who rush to have the lunch in the first batch, lest they should miss any dish that might get exhausted if they take their lunch in a later batch etc. have the lunch to their heart's content. I will be satisfied with whatever dishes, left towards the end" said Subbu, smiling.

It appeared to Rajiv that Subbu really had such an attitude and that he was not making up something, just to show himself as a person with a sense of detachment.

After conversing with him for a few minutes, Rajiv told Subbu, "Sir, please go and have your lunch. Three or four batches would have been over by  this time. There may not be many dishes left for you" with real concern.

Subbu began to move, saying, "I will. Usually, when I go to take my lunch, the cooks, the servers and the servants will be eating, with almost all other guests having had their lunch!" 

"By the way. I am your uncle. Don't call me sir!" he added.

After Subbu had left, Rajiv's father came there and asked Rajiv, "What were you talking to Subbu?"

"I was talking to him casually."

"He is a useless fellow. He doesn't have a regular job. He is considered a misfit in our family" said Rajiv's father.

However, Rajiv's brief interaction with Subbu created in Rajiv's mind, an impression of Subbu as a person of noble intentions. Before leaving the wedding hall, he asked Subbu for his address and got it.

Subbu told Rajiv, "Come to my house, when you have time."

After that, Rajiv made it a habit of visiting Subbu once in a few weeks and conversing with him. 

Rajiv's father asked him, "Why do you keep visiting Subbu? What is there for you to talk with him?"

Rajiv said, "Dad! Conversing with Subbu uncle gives me a feeling of happiness and satisfaction. I think he is a genius. It appears that there is no topic under the sun that he is not knowledgeable about. His perspective is profound and his views are objective and fair."

After Rajiv had got married, his wife also expressed her displeasure about his visiting Subbu frequently. "Visiting a person like him is not in keeping with your stature or status" she said.

"He may be below us in economic and social status. But the knowledge, wisdom and inspiration I derive from a noble person like him are invaluable" said Rajiv.

"I don't understand what you find in him" said his wife, not impressed by Rajiv's reply.

'She is echoing the words that came from my father, earlier. If I explain to her and my father how I took some important decisions about my life, following the wisdom and counsel of Subbu uncle, and how those decisions have transformed my life, will they understand and get convinced about the value of my association with that noble man?' wondered Rajiv.

Thirukkural

Section 2

Materialism

Chapter 45
Association With Great Men

Verse 440 (in Tamil):

aRan aRindhu mUththa aRivudaiyAr kENmai
thiRan aRindhu thErndhu koLal.

Meaning:

The friendship of virtuous men of mature wisdom is to be appreciated and secured. 

(This is the English version of the Tamil story 'dhUraththu uRavu' by the same author.)

Verse 442 (Soon)
Verse 440