78. Sethu's Temperament

Sethu was lonely, despite having a wife and two, children and despite being wealthy!

When Vanaja got engaged to Sethu, she thought she was lucky. Sethu was wealthy and he was the only son of his parents. She envisaged a life of happiness after marriage.

Soon after her marriage, Sethu's mother told Vanaja, when they were alone, "Sethu is a bit short tempered. You should learn to live with his frequent display of anger."

Vanaja didn't think much of her mother-in-law's warning. She knew that some people were short-tempered by nature. She thought she could manage to live with his temper.

But she couldn't.

If Sethu was 'a bit short-tempered,' as described by her mother-in-law, Vanaja would have managed. Even if he was 'much short-tempered,' she could have managed. But how could she manage to live with a person, who appeared to have no emotion other than anger.

"Auntie! Why is he like this? He gets angry for no reason at all. How can I manage such a person?" Vanaja asked her mother-in-law.

"That is the way he talks to me also. I won't know what he expected from me. Earlier, he was afraid to talk to his father. But subsequently, he started yelling at his father also. His father has since stopped talking to Sethu.

The question 'In such a background, why did you get him married at all?' arose in Vanaja's mind. But she didn't ask the question.

Life went on. Three children - two boys and a girl - were born to Sethu and Vanaja.

Vanaja was nurturing a faint hope that Sethu would change, after children were born to them. But that hope turned out to be a mirage.

Sethu didn't show any love to his children, nor did he play with them. He often showed his irritation to them. He treated them as if they were children of some neighbours, who were in his house, causing nuisance to him.

As the children grew up, they learnt that their father was a person who could never speak to them with kindness. So, they began to avoid him and found it safe to keep away from him. This made them look upon their mother as their only source of love and become intimate with her.

Sethu's parents died one after another. Sethu didn't seem to have any feeling about their passing away. "It is natural for people to grow old and die. You and I will also be leaving this world, some day!" he told Vanaja, as if he was a philosopher.

The children were growing up fast.

After their eldest son had completed his education, he got a job in a far off place. Vanaja told him, "Your brother, sister and I will come and live with you. Your brother and sister can join a school there and continue their studies."

"What about dad?" asked the son.

"Let him remain here. I am suggesting that the three of us come to your place we all can live there so that we can be away from your father!" said Vanaja.

"What a wonderful idea!" said Vanaja's daughter, the youngest of her three children, feeling excited by the idea.

When Vanaja revealed her decision to Sethu, he asked her, "Why are you going away?"

"We are unable to live with your angry outbursts and lack of kindness!"

"Who will cook the food for me?"

"I will ask the maid Selvi to cook. But if you yell at her the way you have been yelling at me and the children, she will quit. You can fix the salary for her, after talking to her!" said Vanaja.

It was three years since Vanaja and the children had gone away. Vanaja would write to Sethu at least once in a month. Sethu would read the letters and tear them off. He didn't reply to any of her letters.

Their younger son had also completed his job and got a job. Their daughter was was about to complete her studies. Vanja was looking for a suitable groom for her. Sethu learnt these developments through Vanaja's letters.

Sethu was sitting on the pial of his house, feeling irritated. Some boys were playing ball on the street. The ball fell inside Sethu's house.

  

A boy came to Sethu and asked him, "Grandpa! Our ball has fallen inside your house. Can I go and take it?"

"No, you can't!" yelled Sethu, angrily.

Other boys came there and begged him to let them take the ball. But Sethu was adamant. The boys went back, feeling disappointed.

One boy picked up a pebble from the street and threw it at Sethu.

Sethu felt the pain.

Thirukkural
Section 1
The Path of Virtue

Chapter 8
Love and Affection

Verse 78 (In Tamil)

anbagaththillA uyir vAzhkkai vanpARk kaN
vaRRal maram thaLirththaRRu.

Meaning:

The life of a person who has no love at heart is as futile as a dried up tree blossoming in a desert.

(This is the English version of the Tamil story 'sEthuvin kObham' by the same author)

Verse 79
Verse 77